This article was written while I was working for World Vision Cambodia.
Phyrun’s Family Trades
Domestic Violence for Love
Phyrun Dym is the oldest
son of three siblings. He is now eleven years old and lives with his parents in
the wooden house with zinc roof. His father, Dym Duoth is thirty-four year-old,
who is a classical khmer singer for weddings in the village; and his mother,
Hoy Pov, 34, works as a craft weaver. Phyrun’s family lived with domestic
violence for years and everyone in the village recognized that Phyrun’s father
was an alcoholic and acted like a gangster in the village. Things changed when
Phyrun’s father believes in God and became involved in many activities of World
Vision’s.
Phyrun sits on the mat and said, “I couldn’t focus on my study because my parents always quarreled almost everyday.” He continued with a sad face, “I remembered once my father came home drunk and hit my mother, and he kicked all children who were sleeping on the mat. My younger brothers and I immediately woke up scared and cried. He shouted at us to stop crying.”
He added, “I didn’t like my father because he was always drunk and was an unreasonable person; he seemed not to love the family. He always used forceful words with me; I never forgot when he threw a book and it hit my rim of my right eye and it was bleeding.”
Phyrun’s father, Dym Duoth was recognized as a bully in the village, and he was a person with bad manner. He was a big gangster with many followers in the village. He never thought about the family, he hang out with friends for drink until he was drunk. He enjoyed life at night. He caused many problems in the village such as fighting with others for no reason. Phyrun’s father confessed, “I was a bad husband, bad father, and a bad neighbor. Once I was really angry with my wife, and I smashed my motorbike in front of her. I was a gangster even my family was really poor; I acted like I was richer than everyone. Since the family was in debt, I started to re-think about the family and children’s future.”
Phyrun’s father went to work in Phnom Penh City and also went to Thailand to work as a worker in order to earn money to repay debt. Afterward, he learned how to sing by just listening to music and radio, and he became a classical wedding singer for wedding events in the village. He also knows how to play classical wedding instrument. Phyrun shared, “My father loves and cares for all the children, and he stopped using angry words against us. He initiated the child club at home with supports from World Vision staffs to gather all the children in the village to come and learn altogether. I am so happy with what he does.”
Phyrun’s family has been involved with World Vision since 2006 while the Stong Area Development Programme (ADP) started working with the first project, Food and Water Security. Phyrun’s father was invited to participate in the trainings, raising chicken, frog, fish, and agriculture. He was voted to be a leader of saving group in his community. Phyrun smiled, “I now love my father so much. He stopped using violence, and tries to earn for the family. Around the house areas, we have green vegetable that my dad has planted. He advised all the children about hygiene and lives in good environment. We now have a toilet, we didn’t have before and we all went to the bush for toilet.”
“My father usually read God’s book with me, and he advises me lots to do good things and try to study hard to have a bright future. I don’t see him drunk anymore; he always teaches all the children in the club to love, and help each other. I see my father sometimes read God’s book with World Vision staffs who always visit my family and they are very friendly, and kind to us,” grinned Phyrun while his two younger brothers are standing nearby him.
Phyrun is a sponsored child of World Vision. He said, “My dream is to become a good teacher in my community, so other children would respect me anywhere they meet me. And I can contribute knowledge to others as my father does lately; he is a key person to teach others about hygiene and stop using violence. He teaches all the children in the child club to be open-minded, love and share each other. I have learned lots from him, but I won’t act like such a gangster and ignore the family.”
A big change of Phyrun’s family has surprised others in the community. Phyrun is a smart student and he can focus on his study now with encouragement of his parents and World Vision’s staff.
“Phyrun's father always participated in any trainings and events, which are conducted by World Vision. He also spends his time to read the Bible and reflect on himself and his family. He always shares and reflects with us to improve his personality and creative ideas to develop for his family and the entire community. I see Phyrun is happier and braver in sharing with other children. The change of the father has influenced all family members, this is the lessons learned pointed out for us as development workers,” concluded Channy, Transformational Development Facilitator Team Leader of Stong ADP.
Phyrun sits on the mat and said, “I couldn’t focus on my study because my parents always quarreled almost everyday.” He continued with a sad face, “I remembered once my father came home drunk and hit my mother, and he kicked all children who were sleeping on the mat. My younger brothers and I immediately woke up scared and cried. He shouted at us to stop crying.”
He added, “I didn’t like my father because he was always drunk and was an unreasonable person; he seemed not to love the family. He always used forceful words with me; I never forgot when he threw a book and it hit my rim of my right eye and it was bleeding.”
Phyrun’s father, Dym Duoth was recognized as a bully in the village, and he was a person with bad manner. He was a big gangster with many followers in the village. He never thought about the family, he hang out with friends for drink until he was drunk. He enjoyed life at night. He caused many problems in the village such as fighting with others for no reason. Phyrun’s father confessed, “I was a bad husband, bad father, and a bad neighbor. Once I was really angry with my wife, and I smashed my motorbike in front of her. I was a gangster even my family was really poor; I acted like I was richer than everyone. Since the family was in debt, I started to re-think about the family and children’s future.”
Phyrun’s father went to work in Phnom Penh City and also went to Thailand to work as a worker in order to earn money to repay debt. Afterward, he learned how to sing by just listening to music and radio, and he became a classical wedding singer for wedding events in the village. He also knows how to play classical wedding instrument. Phyrun shared, “My father loves and cares for all the children, and he stopped using angry words against us. He initiated the child club at home with supports from World Vision staffs to gather all the children in the village to come and learn altogether. I am so happy with what he does.”
Phyrun’s family has been involved with World Vision since 2006 while the Stong Area Development Programme (ADP) started working with the first project, Food and Water Security. Phyrun’s father was invited to participate in the trainings, raising chicken, frog, fish, and agriculture. He was voted to be a leader of saving group in his community. Phyrun smiled, “I now love my father so much. He stopped using violence, and tries to earn for the family. Around the house areas, we have green vegetable that my dad has planted. He advised all the children about hygiene and lives in good environment. We now have a toilet, we didn’t have before and we all went to the bush for toilet.”
“My father usually read God’s book with me, and he advises me lots to do good things and try to study hard to have a bright future. I don’t see him drunk anymore; he always teaches all the children in the club to love, and help each other. I see my father sometimes read God’s book with World Vision staffs who always visit my family and they are very friendly, and kind to us,” grinned Phyrun while his two younger brothers are standing nearby him.
Phyrun is a sponsored child of World Vision. He said, “My dream is to become a good teacher in my community, so other children would respect me anywhere they meet me. And I can contribute knowledge to others as my father does lately; he is a key person to teach others about hygiene and stop using violence. He teaches all the children in the child club to be open-minded, love and share each other. I have learned lots from him, but I won’t act like such a gangster and ignore the family.”
A big change of Phyrun’s family has surprised others in the community. Phyrun is a smart student and he can focus on his study now with encouragement of his parents and World Vision’s staff.
“Phyrun's father always participated in any trainings and events, which are conducted by World Vision. He also spends his time to read the Bible and reflect on himself and his family. He always shares and reflects with us to improve his personality and creative ideas to develop for his family and the entire community. I see Phyrun is happier and braver in sharing with other children. The change of the father has influenced all family members, this is the lessons learned pointed out for us as development workers,” concluded Channy, Transformational Development Facilitator Team Leader of Stong ADP.
-Ends-
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