Vichheka Sok

This article was written while I was working for World Vision Cambodia.

Title: Ny sacrified her happiness because of the family

Ny* is the oldest daughter of three siblings. Ny is originally Vietnamese and she speaks some of the Khmer language. Her father passed away four years ago bin a sinking  boat when he was working as a fisherman. Ny’s mother is addicted to playing card with other neighbours and spends little time with her children and family. Soon after Ny’s father died, her mother married another man that Ny didn’t really like.

Ny decided to leave home and hoped to help her family get a better life since everything seemed to be failing because of the poverty. As the oldest child of the family, Ny tries hard and devotes her time to the family, especially to her two younger sisters.

Ny was convinced by an old neighbour to come to Poipet and work in café. But the promise was vacant. Once there, Ny was advised to sell herself since it would help her earn more money to send to her family. With the dream of buying a house for her family, Ny submitted to the request. This is Ny’s story:

“My name is Ny. I love others calling me Ny because I love this name so much, and it sounds sweet to me.

“I am originally Vietnamese. All my family members live in Vietnam. I used to study in Grade 8 (in Vietnam). I like studying, and I dreamed of being a useful person for the family.

“I have a mother who never cared about the children. My mother is a card addict. She loves playing cards more than she loves her children. My father had a boat and he was always on the boat with his friends to catch shellfish. He earned a lot of income by buying and selling shellfish. One day, there was a storm and the boat sank and he disappeared. I miss him so much. He was a good father and he promised me that he’d buy me new clothes, but now, there is nothing.

“I was so mad at my mother when she found another husband, and she got pregnant. Since then, she completely ignored my younger sisters and me. I quit school to stay at home and take care of my younger sisters.

“My younger sisters and I moved to live with grandmother since my mother sold the house because she needed money for her new husband to fish, and with some money she bought jewelry for herself. 

“I felt I had no love from my mother. I pitied my younger sisters so much who were studying and they needed my care. I wanted to buy a house for my sisters, and have a good job at home, so I could take good care of younger sisters. I am like their mother too because they don’t get any warmth from my mother.

“Once there was a neighbour who was about 50 years old. She has a granddaughter who I know very well. The granddaughter is the same age as me. This old neighbour tried many times to talk with my mother and my grandmother to let me come to Cambodia to work in a casino. But my mother and my grandmother didn’t agree, and they wanted me to stay at home and look after my younger sisters.

“In the evening one day, the same neighbour came to me and convinced me when I was alone at home. She said I would get a job in a casino in Phnom Penh and I could earn lots there. That way, I could help my family by sending them money monthly. Hearing this, I imagined I would be able to buy a house for my family and I could become a good hairdresser at home and be with my younger sisters all the time.

“I decided to go to Phnom Penh with that old woman. Her granddaughter also came along. Actually this old woman own a small café shop in Poipet which is near the border of Cambodia and Thailand. That old woman told me to work in the café.

“There are many guys who came and drank at the café. And the other girl who is the old woman’s granddaughter went out every night. Once, that girl told me that she earned a lot of money by selling herself to get money. The old woman also told me about selling my virginity because it would be easy to earn money.

“When I heard about the easiness of earning money, I kept dreaming of buying a new house for my younger sisters and returning home. Soon after that, I sold myself. I slept with many guys, and they were Thai and Chinese guys. I received eight to nine guys per day. I got hurt very much for the first time, but I had no way to be better since this was a good way that I could earn for my family. I gave money every month to the old woman to send to my family in Vietnam. I realized that the old woman took a lot of my money because my family received my money only sometimes, and some months they received nothing.

“I got 10 US dollars per guest, and I handed all money to the old woman because she required it.

“I met some guests who tried to convince me to use drugs, but I never used because I knew it wasn’t good. And I saw a few people who lived nearby the café who also used drug, and they had to drug themselves daily or their body would tremble and look pale. I was so scared of this. I rejected all guests who wanted me to use drugs before sleeping with them. They didn’t beat me, but sometimes they used insulting words out loud towards me. So I kept quiet.

“One day, in the morning, there was a Khmer guy dressed simply to come to have a cup of coffee, and he said he needed a girl to sleep with tonight and he asked whether this place has any girls or not. I told him there was a girl for him. Then in the evening, many policemen came to the café and arrested me, the old woman and her granddaughter.

“I was referred to World Hope organisation in Siem Reap province. But there was nobody who could speak Vietnamese there, so they sent me to World Vision because there was a counselor who spoke Vietnamese.

“At first, staying at the Near Vear Thmey Centre of World Vision made me feel so bad and I really wanted to go back to Vietnam to see my family. I don’t talk to anybody at the centre.

“A counselor who spoke Vietnamese at the centre was really nice to me. She kept saying kind words to me in Vietnamese, and she encouraged me to have hope in life from now on because I’m safe with love and care.

“I started to like every word of my Vietnamese counselor. I compared my situation in Vietnam with my family, working in Poipet, and stayed in the centre. I loved the centre the most because everybody took good care of me and I have learned a lot about cooking, about the Khmer language, about planting vegetables and about braiding beads.

“I received love and care that I never had experienced in life before. I now feel so lucky to know World Vision. I love a counselor named Kim as my mother. She is a best mother I have ever seen. I consider her as my second mother, and I will never forget her in this life.

“I feel sad because I will reintegrate to Vietnam soon. I will miss everything at the centre. But it’s life and I have to go and take care of my younger sisters. I will also learn how to be a good hairdresser in Vietnam. I hope to open a small hairdressing shop in Vietnam, so I can be always with my younger sisters, and I will treat them well. I will not let my younger sisters do the same as what I experienced.

“I now see the world is beautiful. I love my family, love World Vision and love seeing my younger sisters grow.”

Note: Ny* is the name that she gives to herself.   

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